A remix of Disclosure’s ‘Tenderly’ from Northern vibe-machine Kidnap Kid, this sounds like it was conceived in an optimistic vacuum. Bouncier than Mr. Blobby’s testicles covered in Flubber, it has a smooth, tropical vibe that will leave you yearning for a cocktail-filled pineapple (unless you have a heart of stone). I’m pretty convinced that if you stab someone during this tune, jelly beans will gush from the wound. Yum.
In terms of release, we’ve been assured that it’s coming soon and will probably be available as a free download, so head over to Kidnap Kid’s Facebook page to stay updated.
Forthcoming on Pictures Music, Whats There — missing apostrophe intentional — is a 3 track release from Welsh multi-instrumentalist Dauwd. Lauded by the likes of Giles Petersen, Caribou and The XX (on their confusing blog), his style is profoundly organic, mellow and richer than Scrooge McDuck. The title tune, ‘Whats There’, is similar to the recent crop of ’90s house revival tunes, with a sampled vocal snippet and deep kicks thrumming consistently throughout, but there’s an altogether more mellifluous vibe that sets Dauwd apart. Despite this, I was actually quite disappointed when the bassline that kicks in at 1:58 wasn’t continued later on, it made me feel like I’d just discovered that injecting chocolate intensifies the flavour and then realised chocolate had been obsolete since the asteroid hit, you know, the one that wiped out most of the human race except a few stereotypes who banded together for survival. I’d be the nerdy one who eventually wins over the attractive female. Definitely.
Anyway, I posted this because Dauwd is playing alongside Scuba in Sheffield tonight at Drumro[ll] and both me and Oldsy are making an appearance. Advance tickets are sold out online, but there’s a few knocking about at Bungalows & Bears and Golden Harvest and there’ll be a limited supply on the door so you should come down. If you manage to make it and want an autograph from us, just ask…and then brandish a fiver with the promise of more to come (we need the money). Head to Drumro[ll] on Facebook for mo.
Never gentlemen to slink in through the back door, the Cool Beans crew — although they’re more of a rabble — are once again bursting in through the skylight like incompetent Hollywood jewel thieves with another line-up of epic proportions. Hitting Sheffield Uni’s Union on 11/11/11 like some kind of musical suicide cult, DJ Woody will be headlining proceedings with his mind-blowing ‘Turntables in Technicolor’ showcase (see video below). Alongside the man DJ Yoda calls a “demi-god” will be masters of melange Dutty Moonshine, ska/reggae 9-piece (no KFC) New Town Kings and Sheffield’s answer to funky stuffed cabbage, the Balkan Bandits. DJ support will come from duo System:attic and general entertainment will flourish from the possibility of a man dressed as a monkey doing the haka on the bar with you. Which, if you’re honest with yourself, is right up your street.
Details? 11/11/11 at the University of Sheffield’s Foundry and Fusion. Tickets are £5 advance and I would urge you to get them hand delivered, mainly because the option comes with the promise of “great chat” and I would like to see if they actually have this “great chat” or come up with some kind of Natwest inspired one-size-fits-all natter that makes you realise everyone now has a cardboard heart. I’m pretty convinced they’ll manage to deliver the former and you’ll wake up on a ferry to Tangiers, but I need to test the theory. Anyway, visit Cool Beans on Facebook for more info and look out for me, I might be there. I’ll arrive on a rhino.
If you’ve been to Sheffield at any point during the last year then you’ve probably heard hushed whispers of the fabled “Cool Beans”, a fraternity of people who know not the boundaries of reality. Many thought it was a secret society akin to the Illuminati but it soon became evident that it was bigger, much bigger. Gaggles of freaks — or partygoers, whatever — would gather in venues around the city and listen to twisted DJs, perverse bands and witness other bizarre performances, all the while tipsy on skins of rich wine. Well, the time has come for you to join the ranks of the beans and come Friday 14 October, ye shall be inaugurated and your life shall change forever.
Ok, I’ll drop the medieval pretences, but you should seriously consider donning your robes and coming out to celebrate the 1st birthday of Cool Beans. Head honcho Benedict Arnold and his associates have cultivated a rather delectable line-up, with Manchester hip-hop crew Surreal Knowledge headlining proceedings like a posse of proud tigers on stilts. Elsewhere on the bill DJ Mikey J will be bringing his usual eclectic styles, comedy tramps Ham Pocket will lay down some classics, electro swing DJs The Legitimate Gentleman will be wearing suits (I’ve just assumed this) and of course, the Cool Beans DJs will be smashing it with their usual eccentric selections. How lovely.
In terms of the important details, it’s £3 before 11pm, £4 after and the venue is Penelope’s. If you want more info head over to the official Cool Beans site or their Facebook page. I shall be making an appearance, so if you want to buy me a drink or dunno, like a whole bottle of something, I will graciously accept.
The last Soup Kitchen was bigger than your strange Uncle’s ego after a successful 6-week stint on Countdown which, if you’re wondering, is actually a pretty decent achievement. Thankfully, you’ll be able to get out of the house and away from his endless “Susie Dent said” stories and patchy beard on May 20 as the next instalment in the soupy saga brings Breach, Ben UFO, Blawan, Cooly G and T. Williams to this humble city we call Sheffield. Such an eminent line-up demands your enthusiastic attendance and if you fail to show up, lightning will strike you on the way to your next boxercise class. If it doesn’t, well, you got lucky…this time. Breach’s ‘Fatherless’ on a big system will be better than a cold pot noodle and a rough sleep on your sheetless bed anyway.
Soup Kitchen have been promoting ridiculous events in Sheffield for quite a while now, probably even longer than you’ve been pretending to like dubstep and garage so that kind-of-hot girl you sort of know might notice you and think you’re cool. Just recently, for example, they brought Dark Sky and xxxy to the original home of decent spoons and I don’t need to tell you how happy that made me (hint: very).
Continuing the theme of astute bookings, next week sees an event which is such a banger I saw the poster and had to double-take like a cartoon cat. I then walked around the block — or would have if this was America — and had another look just to make sure it was real. With a line-up comprising Joy Orbison, Pariah, Midland, Lil’ Silva as well as the inevitable Soup and Barry residents, it’s going to be more exciting than the time you and your best friend Ronnie found that dirty magazine in the woods. Basically I reckon you should snag a ticket pretty sharpish because come next Friday (March 25th) you won’t want to be standing out in the cold whilst everyone else is inside loving it like homeless men at a real soup kitchen…on Christmas Day.
Tickets are £10 and in terms of the venue, it’s a secret…until 24 hours before the event at which point it will be announced on Facebook. Talking of Facebook, head over to the event page for more info. See you there.